1. “Fugitive” by David Gray: David, seriously, what happened to your music? Ever since you got a big fanbase with your 2000 record “White Ladder”, your music has gotten worse with each album, and unfortunately this is no exception. ‘Nuff said.
2. “I’ll Go Crazy (If I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight)” by U2: Should be re-titled “I’ll Go Crazy (If I Hear This Song Again Tonight)”. Don’t get me wrong, I love U2, but out of the three songs that have become hits off their latest release (No Line On the Horizon), this is my least favorite. It sounds more ordinary than the other two songs, (the Lenny Kravitz-ish “Get On Your Boots”, and “Magnificent”, which showcases their melodic brand of electric guitar-based rock well).
3. Why I Am” by Dave Matthews Band: It’s nice to know that after their first riff-oriented but somewhat weary single off Big Whiskey And the Groogrux King (“Funny the Way It Is”), that the second one, “Why I Am”, is a welcome return to the funky, playful, energetic DMB sound in days of old, like their ’96 song “Too Much”, which is a similar song, but doesn’t feature quite the guitar noodling this one does.
4. “Maybe” by Ingrid Michaelson: The way Ingrid Michaelson looks (and sounds) suggests something of a younger musical sister to Lisa Loeb, and this song is not only no exception to this rule, but probably the one that resembles Lisa Loeb’s music the most. It’s not as good, though. Where Loeb’s music (particularly her first and best-known single, “Stay [I Missed You]”) sounded nostalgic (and fresh, for its time) enough to be tolerable, Michaelson’s “Maybe” sounds like what has now become a tired cliché in the folk-pop world. That, and it also uses (practically) the same chord sequence as the main verses in Gladys Knight and The Pips’ “Midnight Train to Georgia” (though perhaps this wouldn’t bug me so much if I actually liked the song). What also bugs me about, well, any Ingrid Michaelson song that has become popular enough to hit the Top 20 on the Triple-A charts is that these people always seem to choose the more generic sounding songs in her catalog, as opposed to, say, the more delicate, poignant, Regina Spektor-ish “Breakable”.
5. “The Fixer” by Pearl Jam: It’s cool how I’m always fooled into thinking this is a song by The Hives or The White Stripes when I hear the opening riff, proving that although Eddie Vedder might have gone all Bob Dylan on us with the “Into the Wild” soundtrack (which isn’t a BAD thing, mind you), him and the boys can still rock out when they want to! Also, it’s a pretty fun, catchy song for a band that has been labeled “grunge”. This has more of a garage rock-y flavor to it!
6. “Falling For You” by Colbie Caillat: Yecch! Everything Colbie Caillat has done so far sounds like super-generic folk-pop, with a somewhat neo-soul inflection, and this is no exception. And to think this is the fourth time she’s been on the Triple-A charts. Wow. How some people become successful in the music biz, I’ll just never understand.
7. “21 Guns” by Green Day: Again, don’t get me wrong. “Good Riddance” (aka “Time of Your Life”) was great, but it probably should have been the only “ballad” Green Day focused on. They seem to be taking a similar path now to what Heart took in the ‘80s. Heart’s ‘70s ballads (like “Dog And Butterfly” and “Dreamboat Annie”) were great because they were honest, heartfelt acoustic songs with no “flashiness” (Journey, anyone?) to prove how great they were, but their ‘80s ballads (like “What About Love” and “These Dreams”) relied on heavier instrumentation (not to mention more electronic keyboards) and therefore felt more cheesy than they did truly emotional. The same principle seems to apply to Green Day’s “ballads” after the ‘90s, like “Boulevard of Broken Dreams”, “Wake Me Up When September Ends”, and most recently, this song, “21 Guns”. All 3 songs start out acoustic, but they build up much in the same way songs like REO Speedwagon’s “Take It On the Run” did, with the songs ending up as “power ballads” with the electric guitar fronting and the acoustic backing. And these songs are by the same guys who did sarcastic, Ramones-y rants like “Basket Case” and “Welcome to Paradise”?!? Way to go, Green Day, you’ve continued to blow it with your last two albums.
8. “Use Somebody” by Kings of Leon: Great song, but it’s stickin’ to the charts like crazy glue! It’s been on since January, fer goshsakes!! On a side note, this song is KOL’s attempt to be U2 (and/or Springsteen). Every song on that album (Only By the Night) that I’ve heard is like that, actually, but I like the songs anyway.
9. “You Never Know” by Wilco: Proof that Wilco are still awesome after all these years! They are the only band I know whose sound went from sounding like an alt-rock version of The Eagles to being somewhat of a hodgepodge of The Velvet Underground, The Rolling Stones, Bob Dylan, and The Beatles (with a little Steely Dan-style riffs thrown in every now and again for good measure). The Beatles influence in “You Never Know” really shows itself, from the opening drum riff (reminiscent of “Glass Onion”), to the George Harrison-style riffs toward the end of the song. The whimsical, somewhat nonsensical lyrics only add to its charm. Well done, Wilco!!
10. “Hey Soul Sister” by Train: This song just seems to copy off of Jack Johnson's style (and maybe a bit Jason Mraz’s) directly. Wow, Train sure have gone a long way down musically. They started off as like a Counting-Crows-meets-Spin-Doctors kinda band on their debut (which is probably best known for “Meet Virginia”). Then “Drops of Jupiter” became their most popular song when their next album was released, and the success of it seemed to go to their heads so much, that every other song they’ve released since has veered away from their initial alternative/folk-rock style and gone more in the direction of more bland folk-pop a la Jason Mraz and John Mayer (with a bit of Maroon 5 and The Fray tossed in there for good, or in this case, bad measure). Honestly, why the heck are these guys still releasing records? They’ve completely wrecked what they once were.
11. “Little Bribes” by Death Cab for Cutie: For a band called “Death Cab for Cutie”, this song sure is upbeat. Kinda comes off as a cross between Oasis’ “Lyla” and Neil Diamond’s “comeback” song (from 2005), “Delirious Love” (Who knew I’d be making a comparison of Death Cab to Neil Diamond?!? Didn’t see that one coming!) Honestly, what’s not to love about this song? (That is, if you’re not sick of hearing it…yet). It’s got a hook-y, toe-tapping beat, somewhat surreal lyrics (although most of Death Cab’s songs tend to have this), and an even more surreal (and fun) music video! Here’s hoping that more bands (and songs) like this will one day grace the music industry!
12. “Life In Technicolor II” by Coldplay: Coldplay…another one of those “Hey! Wha’happened?” bands. Their synthesis of Radiohead, Jeff Buckley, and U2 on their debut was great, and pretty unique for a time when alt-rock was dominated by crappy “nu-metal” bands like Korn and Limp Bizkit. Some of that Radiohead/Buckley/U2 sound remained on their second album, but I have a feeling that the success of “Clocks” (which only sounded like the third band, if any) went to Chris Martin’s head, and that he’s basically wanted to be Bono from his third album on. Sorry Chris, the “ethereal” sound you’re going for on “Life In Technicolor II” just ain’t working for me. You’ll have to pull off something pretty good to make me forget that you’re a U2 wannabe.
13. “Backwards Down the Number Line” by Phish: Phish have often been compared to The Grateful Dead for their improvisational, “jam-band” approach to music, as well as their extensive touring. This song, which appears to be their most popular so far, despite the fact that Phish have been around (and known) since the early ‘90s, probably sounds more like The Dead than any song I’ve ever heard of theirs (and definitely more so than the Trey Anastasio solo records, which sounded more like Clapton than The Dead – not that that’s a bad thing…) You can hear little bits of The Dead’s “Sugar Magnolia” and “Bertha” in this song, and the guitar solo even sounds like it could’ve been done by Jerry Garcia himself (had he still been alive at the time of this song’s recording, that is). The mellow folk-rock/blues combination that was trademark for The Dead, and now for Phish, pretty much makes this song irresistible! The only complaint I have about this song is that the chorus is repeated too many times. But the other factors of this song pretty much compensate for that.
14. “Closer to Love” by Mat Kearney: As if Mat Kearney wasn’t bland enough, this song adds a happy, shiny feel to his previously Coldplay-meets-John-Mayer style material. This song, then, is both bland and sappy. Not a good combination, if you ask me, but somehow, the Triple-A audience digs it. Go figure.
15. “Dreams” by Brandi Carlile: Honestly, I don’t get how come Brandi Carlile has become so popular on the Triple-A circuit within the past 3 or 4 years. To me a lot of her songs just sound the same, and this is no exception. Basically it’s just k.d. lang stuff with higher vocals and a blander sound. I hate when all the really good songs on these charts are just inching to get to the Top 20 but they never do, and meanwhile the blander songs like this just shoot up to the top really quickly. Go figure.
16. “Staring Down” by Collective Soul: Wow. Here’s yet another “Hey! Wha’happened?” band (there seem to be a lot of these on this countdown this time around). Collective Soul’s unique brand of melodic post-grunge seemed really fresh and fun to listen to in the ‘90s. However, ever since then, they seemed to have dropped the whole “post-grunge” getup (after all, it’s not the dominant musical style in modern rock anymore), and instead, have just become more of a melodic pop-rock group (with a few exceptions, most notably the hard-rocking “Counting the Days”, which even briefly got airplay on L.A.’s classic rock station KLOS at the time the song first came out). If only Collective Soul could take a clue from other former ‘90s alt-pop acts like Fastball, who have refashioned themselves as indie-rockers (at least in sound) a la Kaiser Chiefs, Modest Mouse, The Killers, etc.
17. “Her Diamonds” by Rob Thomas: Okaaayyy….why the heck is this even on the countdown?! Just because Rob Thomas was the lead singer of (what was once considered) a ‘90s alt-pop group, doesn’t mean his solo material is gonna sound the same. His first solo single, “Lonely No More”, sounded like Justin Timberlake (albeit with a “Latin” tinge), for goodness’ sakes! That’s not even pop-rock, just pop! This one sounds a little less like that, but it still sounds like your average, run-of-the-mill Top 40/Adult Contemporary song to me. It truly befuddles me that an audience capable of enjoying songs by Radiohead, Beck, and R.E.M. can sit through crap like this as well.
18. “The Great Defector” by Bell X1: Yesss!!!! This could quite possibly be the best song of 2009!! (But, of course, we still have three more months to see if that still holds true). Talking Heads have been one of my fave groups ever for a really long time, and Bell X1 is introducing their sound (and a spot-on imitation of David Byrne’s voice) to a whole new generation in this song! Play this song and “And She Was” back to back and tell me you don’t hear a connection between the two songs, at least musically. You probably will. And that’s not all! The surreal-ness of the lyrics in this song just add to the fun. And you can even dance to it if you wanted to (unlike most of the other songs on this countdown). This song is an instant classic! Words cannot describe how much I love this one!!
19. “Be There” by Howie Day: Howie Day tries to make his songs poignant and meaningful, but I personally think he tries too hard. This is no exception. It uses a somewhat “ethereal” sound in the beginning of the song as if to hammer into the listener’s head, “Look at me! I’m a poet! I’m making you listen to how meaningful this song is!” But it just comes off sounding like that brand of generic folk-pop that John Mayer (probably) started and has become like a bad itch, where you want it to go away, but it just won’t.
20. “Something Beautiful” by Needtobreathe: This song does not live up to its title – well not for me, anyway. Should be more like “Something Average”. It tries hard to sound like an earnestly emotional song, but it just fails. Honestly, these guys are like Five For Fighting, but with acoustic guitars instead of pianos (sorry for those who like Five For Fighting, but even “Superman (It’s Not Easy)” got tiring after it became an Adult Contemporary radio staple).
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